Posts tagged ‘fail’

September 19, 2011

Apple I Hate You

Apple why must you torment me with your incessant updates/upgrades, leaving me to believe that my main problem with your glorious phone would be fixed. Alas, I finish upgrading and there’s nothing but minor changes that I’ll never notice. With the understanding that some bugs and security failures need attending to, I can never comprehend as to why you guys would overlook such a huge flaw in your device. You describe the phone with such grandiosity that it’ll make a blind person buy it.

More after the jump.

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August 30, 2011

Did Lil’ Wayne End The Skinny Jeans Trend?

Was this all it took for people such as myself to realized that skinny jeans should come to an end? After watching the VMAs I was already thinking that this dude lost his mind with those leopard print spray-on tights. Although I’m a purveyor of skinny jeans, sadly I can no longer support this trend. Maybe Weezy’s stylist made a mistake. Maybe they ran out of other jean designs. Whether if any of those things happened the trend must come to an end.

To make matters even worse, they were women’s jeggings! There’s no way I can look at Weezy the same. Hood pass revoked, rockstar card declined, masculinity turned away at the door. It’s bad enough Wayne threw out a corny subliminal diss at Jay-Z on It’s Good, and Beyonce’s pregnancy/belly rub was the highlight of the night. He decides to provide us with shitty performance to end the VMAs and wore those painted-on jeans that were made for the female gender. Why Wayne? Why? The silver lining in all this for Wayne is that his album is projected to sell 700k its first week. But the majority of people will remember his wack jab at Jay and him wearing a tranny’s nut-huggers.

Oh and if you ladies would like a pair of those fabulous jeggings (laughs) they’re made by Tripp NYC. You can buy them here for $44.

Women

August 17, 2011

Video: Fat Guy Sings The HELL Out Of Katy Perry’s “California Girls”


New Jersey why do we continue to embarrass ourselves??? Someone should “tiger uppercut” this dude off the bus, or at least give him a sandwich so he would shut the hell up. But this is funny as all hell though.

Seen: Guyism

May 5, 2011

Video: Wow, This Is A Fucking Fail


I would’ve looked at him just like everyone else. He’s like the dude in Not Another Teenage Movie that can’t get the clapping down right.

April 3, 2011

Charlie Sheen | My Violent Torpedo of Truth: Review (YIKES!)

Charlie Sheen definitely didn’t have a “winning” moment. After reading this you’ll be even more convinced that he’s way the fuck off his rocker.

Full review after the jump.

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March 30, 2011

Video: Beagle Tries To Eat A Glass Door


You can thank Kevin Pereira for this hilarity.

March 29, 2011

WTF!? News: Man Glues Tiny Hat To His Head


You can’t even make this shit up. There’s a reason its called super glue, have these guys not seen American Pie 2??

Thanks: HuffPost

March 25, 2011

WTF!? News: Weed-Smoking Bear Feeder Gets Mauled

 

There are certain jobs you can get high in the morning for: barista, cashier, data entry clerk, street promoter, and Snoop Dogg’s assistant. Animal feeder? Especially feeding bears?? Um no. Maybe if we were to feed pigeons or parrots. You would think that if he was high, wouldn’t he want to eat the animals? I mean when the munchies kick in you’re willing to eat anything in sight. Trust me, I had a friend eat out of trash can for some chicken wings (real negro shit).

HuffPost:

KALISPELL, Mont. — The Montana Supreme Court has upheld a Workers’ Compensation Court ruling that about $65,000 in medical bills incurred by a man who was mauled while feeding the bears at a tourist attraction should be covered by workers’ compensation, despite the fact the man had smoked marijuana on the day of the attack.

The court filed its opinion Tuesday, the Daily Inter Lake reported.

Brock Hopkins filed a claim with the Uninsured Employers’ Fund in December 2007, saying he suffered injuries to his legs and buttocks when he was mauled by a bear at Great Bear Adventures near Glacier National Park on Nov. 2, 2007. Hopkins was treated for his injuries at a Kalispell hospital.

The UEF denied Hopkins’ claim because Hopkins had smoked marijuana before entering a bear enclosure. The fund also argued that Hopkins was acting outside the scope of his duties.

Park owner Russell Kilpatrick, who did not have workers’ compensation coverage, argued that Hopkins was a volunteer who Kilpatrick occasionally gave cash to “out of his heart.” Hopkins fed the bears that day after Kilpatrick told him not to because he was tapering their food as they prepared for hibernation, Kilpatrick said.

The Workers’ Compensation Court ruled last June that Hopkins was an employee and noted that while his “use of marijuana to kick off a day of working around grizzly bears was ill-advised to say the least and mind-bogglingly stupid to say the most,” there was no evidence presented regarding Hopkins’ level of impairment.

The WCC found that grizzlies are “equal opportunity maulers” without regard to marijuana consumption.

UEF attorney Joseph Nevin told The Associated Press Thursday that the case is finished and the agency would end up paying an estimated $35,000 in discounted medical bills on behalf of Hopkins. Kilpatrick paid a small penalty for failing to carry workers’ compensation insurance, Nevin said.

A phone listing for Kilpatrick in Coram has been disconnected and there is no phone listing for Great Bear Adventures.

March 22, 2011

Chris Brown’s Douchebaggery Continues On GMA

And you see why I can’t stand this character….

THR:

ABC News is defending Robin Roberts, who upset singer Chris Brown by asking him about his 2009 assault on then-girlfriend Rihanna on Good Morning America Tuesday.
Following the interview, as THR previously reported, Brown trashed his dressing room and broke a window.

“As always, we ask questions that are relevant and newsworthy, and that’s what we did in this interview with Mr. Brown,” an ABC News spokesperson said in a statement.

Brown — who is serving five years of probation since being convicted of felony assault against the singer — got miffed when Roberts first asked him about the incident, telling her, “I think I’m past that in my life. Today’s the album day, so that’s what I’m focused on.”

When she later asked about Rihanna two more times, he snapped, “I think today’s the ALBUM day so that’s what I’m focused on.”

After the interview, he performed “Yeah 3x,” the new single off his new album, F.A.M.E.

The moment the song ended, he stormed off stage and went back to his dressing room, ABC has confirmed.

Then, according to ABC, he came back down the hall, still backstage, and stopped upon seeing the person who produced the segment.

He didn’t have his shirt on.

The show’s hair and makeup staff said they had called security because they heard loud noises coming from the singer’s dressing room.

It was then discovered that a window had been smashed in Brown’s dressing room. The thick glass was destroyed.

By the time the smashed window was discovered, Brown and his team had left the building.

After the show, Roberts Tweeted: “Sure has been an interesting AM @GMA. Still sorting thru everything myself. Just my 2nd day on twitter, wonder what tomorrow will bring?”

According to TMZ, Brown Tweeted, “I’m so over people bringing this past s**t up!!! Yet we praise Charlie sheen and other celebs for there bulls**t.”

He removed the message and posted two more, notes People.com: “Thank you to everyone who supports my music!!! Key Word (music) !!! Love y’all,” and “All my fans!!! This album is for you and only you!!! I’m so tired of everyone else!! Honestly!! I love team breezy!!”

March 15, 2011

Video: Snake Dies From Biting Breast Implant


Who knew fake breasts were deadly? Au naturel my ladies.

She let out a high-pitched scream, as did a voice off camera who appeared to be directing the shoot.
An assistant rushed in to help her pull the snake off and after a few seconds of struggle the creature released its grip.
The peroxide-blonde model was rushed to a nearby hospital and given a tetanus shot.
However, the snake wasn’t so lucky and died from silicone poisoning.

Seen: SRose

March 11, 2011

You Nut Grabbing S.O.B.!


During a soccer match between Quito and Penarol, Dario Rodriguez of Penarol makes an attempt at playing pocket pool with Quito striker Hernan Barcos. This act may have been fine if the dude grabbing the testes would’ve been a female. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case and it’s an extremely dirty play on all levels. What you do in the privacy of your home is cool, just don’t bring that shit to the field.

Seen: Deadspin

March 5, 2011

Few Words About Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian needs to go into hiding after releasing that pile of decaying feces she calls a song. This is the problem with US media, we give the wrong people too much attention or power. Honestly, what talents does Kim Kardashian possess? She looks fucking unbelievable I’ll admit, but I even got bored watching her damn sex tape. If that’s any indication of her personality, which clearly shines through on her reality series, then I’d rather explain colors to the blind. Kim Kardashian is the closest thing we have to human furniture. Oh, and these pics are from the shoot of her video for this shitty song “Jam” (Turn It Up). Now the bitch thinks she’s Nicki Minaj!?


March 3, 2011

Tool Of The Day: Chris Brown

Chris Brown is known as a singer, and he should stick to that. These photos were taken last night and in typical Chris Brown fashion, he looked like a douche. I’m way past the Rihanna incident but this guy drives me crazy to the point where I want to punt a Jack Russell terrier off a bridge every time I see a picture of him. Most people already knew dude couldn’t dress, but this blonde hair shit must come to an abrupt stop. He just reeks of douchebaggery. That’s my two cents.

Photos: YBF

February 28, 2011

Video: This Is How To React To A Red Card

That’s what I’m talking about! Get pissed at the world and let everyone know that you being sent off is bullshit. The player who got hit was clearly flopping, and it worked. Its that kind of attitude soccer needs, a player that’s going to go completely ballistic when the foul was clearly wrong. Unfortunately, Douglas was suspended for five matches and hit with a huge fine. I thought it was kind of worth it.

Props: TheSpoiler

February 27, 2011

Reporter vs. Snow Plow

Wooooow.

January 26, 2011

Video: Athletes x Acting


Athletes trying to act is quite the conundrum. Its good that they’re reaching the younger audience, but its dreadful to watch them act.

January 24, 2011

CHUMP!


Let’s all be honest with this whole Jay Cutler situation. The results from MRI says he has a torn MCL allegedly. When watching the game Cutler was clearly annoyed and disinterested in the game which is understandable when you’re not on the field, besides that he should have been a good teammate and leader by keeping his team charged up and assisting the backup QBs, which he didn’t. I’m sorry but If I have a knee injury I’m still playing regardless, due to the circumstances-it’s the NFC CHAMPIONSHIP!
I’ll take into consideration that Cutler was getting pounded earlier in the season due to Martz QB-killing offensive scheme. Cutler’s body/demeanor was so off-putting that one could only come to the conclusion that he just didn’t care. If you’re able to run or jog you should be out there. Look at Roethlisraper, this guy played with a damn near broken ankle, broken nose, and still toughed it out to lead his team to victory. Even Philip Rivers played with a torn ACL a few years ago in the AFC Championship. For most ATHLETES you would have to drag them off the field, in Cutler’s case he just pussed out.
Cutler’s legacy with the Packers is something worth noting. He’s 1-3 and his QB rating averages out to 57.9. For a QB to never have a rating over 100 against a conference rival is telling, and with this lastest fiasco its safe to say the Packers own Cutler.

UPDATE: Just saw this video. Nothing like a Bears’ fan scorned.

January 20, 2011

Someone Shoot Her!


What the fuck is Nicki Minaj wearing? I get the whole ‘pink’ thing, but this is atrocious! Human cotton candy? I’ve seen it all.

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January 13, 2011

Have You Had Your Drugs Today? (Video)


What the hell was she doing?? She must’ve mixed mushrooms, ecstasy, cocaine, acid, and angel dust together. Bitch is nuts.

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January 13, 2011

Negro WHY!?!?


Its stupidity like this that constantly gives Hip-Hop a bad name. Outside of that, this is typical coonery. A ice cream tattoo? On your face?! Why do I have a feeling his Mama tried to leave him in a back alley dumpster on Prom Night. Gucci Mane just take your ass back to jail….